Monday, May 16, 2005

good weekend/bad weekend

it was nice to get away for a day or two this weekend, but I spent too much time worrying about the children. Casey was with my sister so I knew she was fine but the teenagers were home alone. they're old enough (18 and 16) to stay home by themselves for one night but I don't always trust their judgement. and I definitely don't trust the people (my brother and brother-in-law) who were supposed to check on them to tell me if something was going on that I wouldn't approve of. little things were out of order when we got back Sunday evening and it made me nervous and suspicious. but as I told Brian last night, no one got hurt, nothing was broken and the police didn't show up so I guess there's no reason for me to dwell on it.

we had a nice time while we were gone, except that we had a fight Saturday night. it wasn't a big fight and was over after about thirty minutes. but for us, it was a big deal. because we don't fight. as a matter of fact, this one was only the second one that I can remember. in almost three years, that's pretty amazing.

we don't go out of our way not to fight, but honestly, he never makes me angry. well, rarely anyway. yes, there are times when I get annoyed and a lot of the time, it's just me being hormonal. and there are lots more times when I'm annoying too, I'm sure. we just don't let the little things bother us.

our fight Saturday was probably a little thing that was blown out of proportion because I was getting tired and wanted to go back to the hotel. he's a lot more sociable than I am plus it was his nephew's party so he wanted to stay. but we had already been there for more than eight hours and more people were showing up that I didn't know, which I don't deal with well. and I was super tired.

I told him that he could stay and just call me later if he needed a ride home but he didn't believe me. he made the mistake of saying that he had already gone through that too many times with his ex-wife and it just annoyed the hell out of me. because he's done that before...you know...implied that I was just saying that I wouldn't get angry if he went out without me but not meaning it. his ex used to do that all the time I guess, and then hold it against him if he actually went.

I was more understanding when he was nervous at first. but I've also proved that I mean what I say by not being upset if he goes out without me. quite a few times. so it hurt me that he thought I would actually do that. we said our goodbyes and drove back to the hotel in silence. we got to the room and just sat on separate beds for a few minutes to calm down before working it out. told him that I was tired of being compared to his ex when I didn't deserve it. he admitted that I haven't ever lied to him and that I don't play games. and that was pretty much the end of the argument.

everything was fine, it really wasn't anything to fight about. we talked about it for a little while and then let it go. it was almost over as soon as it began. we ordered some pizza, watched Futurama and went to sleep. the weekend was lovely, but tiring. it was good to get away but it was nice to have things back to normal and I was so happy to get home.

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